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- Abbe Prevost - MANON LESCAUT
- Alcott, Louisa M. - LITTLE MEN
- Alcott, Louisa M. - LITTLE WOMEN
- Alcott, Louisa May - JACK AND JILL
- Austen, Jane - EMMA
- Austen, Jane - MANSFIELD PARK
- Austen, Jane - NORTHANGER ABBEY
- Austen, Jane - PERSUASION
- Austen, Jane - PRIDE AND PREJUDICE
- Austen, Jane - SENSE AND SENSIBILITY
- Ballantyne, R. B. - THE CORAL ISLAND
- Balzac, Honore de - EUGENIE GRANDET
- Balzac, Honore de - FATHER GORIOT
- Baroness Orczy - THE SCARLET PIMPERNEL
- Barrie, James M. - PETER PAN
- Blackmore, R. D. - LORNA DOONE
- Boccaccio, Giovanni - DECAMERONE
- Bronte, Charlotte - JANE EYRE
- Bronte, Emily - WUTHERING HEIGHTS
- Buchan, John - PRESTER JOHN
- Buchan, John - THE THIRTY-NINE STEPS
- Bunyan, John - THE PILGRIM'S PROGRESS
- Burnett, Frances H. - A LITTLE PRINCESS
- Burnett, Frances H. - LITTLE LORD FAUNTLEROY
- Burnett, Frances H. - THE SECRET GARDEN
- Butler, Samuel - EREWHON
- Carroll, Lewis - ALICE IN WONDERLAND
- Carroll, Lewis - THROUGH THE LOOKING-GLASS
- Chaucer, Geoffrey - THE CANTERBURY TALES
- Chesterton, G. K. - A SHORT HISTORY OF ENGLAND
- Chesterton, G. K. - THE INNOCENCE OF FATHER BROWN
- Chesterton, G. K. - THE MAN WHO KNEW TOO MUCH
- Chesterton, G. K. - THE MAN WHO WAS THURSDAY
- Chesterton, G. K. - THE WISDOM OF FATHER BROWN
- Childers, Erskine - THE RIDDLE OF THE SANDS
- Christie, Agatha - THE MYSTERIOUSAFFAIR AT STYLES
- Christie, Agatha - THE SECRET ADVERSARY
- Collins, Wilkie - THE MOONSTONE
- Collodi, Carlo - THE ADVENTURES OF PINOCCHIO
- Conan Doyle, Arthur - A STUDY IN SCARLET
- Conan Doyle, Arthur - MEMOIRS OF SHERLOCK HOLMES
- Conan Doyle, Arthur - THE ADVENTURES OF SHERLOCK HOLMES
- Conan Doyle, Arthur - THE HOUND OF THE BASKERVILLES
- Conan Doyle, Arthur - THE SIGN OF THE FOUR
- Conrad, Joseph - HEART OF DARKNESS
- Conrad, Joseph - LORD JIM
- Conrad, Joseph - NOSTROMO
- Conrad, Joseph - THE NIGGER OF THE NARCISSUS
- Conrad, Joseph - TYPHOON
- Darwin, Charles - THE AUTOBIOGRAPHY OF CHARLES DARWIN
- Darwin, Charles - THE ORIGIN OF SPECIES
- Defoe, Daniel - MOLL FLANDERS
- Defoe, Daniel - ROBINSON CRUSOE
- Dickens, Charles - A CHRISTMAS CAROL
- Dickens, Charles - A TALE OF TWO CITIES
- Dickens, Charles - BLEAK HOUSE
- Dickens, Charles - DAVID COPPERFIELD
- Dickens, Charles - GREAT EXPECTATIONS
- Dickens, Charles - HARD TIMES
- Dickens, Charles - LITTLE DORRIT
- Dickens, Charles - MARTIN CHUZZLEWIT
- Dickens, Charles - OLIVER TWIST
- Dickens, Charles - PICTURES FROM ITALY
- Dickens, Charles - THE MYSTERY OF EDWIN DROOD
- Dickens, Charles - THE PICKWICK PAPERS
- Dostoevsky, Fyodor - CRIME AND PUNISHMENT
- Dostoyevsky, Fyodor - THE BROTHERS KARAMAZOV
- Du Maurier, George - TRILBY
- Dumas, Alexandre - THE COUNT OF MONTE CRISTO
- Dumas, Alexandre - THE MAN IN THE IRON MASK
- Dumas, Alexandre - THE THREE MUSKETEERS
- Eliot, George - ADAM BEDE
- Eliot, George - DANIEL DERONDA
- Eliot, George - MIDDLEMARCH
- Eliot, George - SILAS MARNER
- Eliot, George - THE MILL ON THE FLOSS
- Equiano - AUTOBIOGRAPHY
- Esopo - FABLES
- Fenimore Cooper, James - THE LAST OF THE MOHICANS
- Fielding, Henry - TOM JONES
- Flaubert, Gustave - MADAME BOVARY
- Frank Baum, L. - THE WONDERFUL WIZARD OF OZ
- Frazer, James George - THE GOLDEN BOUGH
- Freud, Sigmund - DREAM PSYCHOLOGY
- Galsworthy, John - THE FORSYTE SAGA
- Gilbert and Sullivan - PLAYS
- Gogol - DEAD SOULS
- Goldsmith, Oliver - SHE STOOPS TO CONQUER
- Goldsmith, Oliver - THE VICAR OF WAKEFIELD
- Grahame, Kenneth - THE WIND IN THE WILLOWS
- Hardy, Thomas - FAR FROM THE MADDING CROWD
- Hardy, Thomas - JUDE THE OBSCURE
- Hardy, Thomas - TESS OF THE D'URBERVILLES
- Hardy, Thomas - THE MAYOR OF CASTERBRIDGE
- Hawthorne, Nathaniel - THE SCARLET LETTER
- Hobbes, Thomas - LEVIATHAN
- Hope, Anthony - THE PRISONER OF ZENDA
- Hornung, E. W. - MR. JUSTICE RAFFLES
- Ibsen, Henrik - AN ENEMY OF THE PEOPLE
- Ibsen, Henrik - CASA DI BAMBOLA
- Ibsen, Henrik - GHOSTS
- Ibsen, Henrik - HEDDA GABLER
- Ibsen, Henrik - JOHN GABRIEL BORKMAN
- Ibsen, Henrik - PILLARS OF SOCIETY
- Ibsen, Henrik - ROSMERHOLM
- Ibsen, Henrik - THE LADY FROM THE SEA
- Ibsen, Henrik - THE MASTER BUILDER
- Ibsen, Henrik - WHEN WE DEAD AWAKEN
- Irving, Washington - THE LEGEND OF SLEEPY HOLLOW
- James, Henry - ITALIAN HOURS
- James, Henry - THE BOSTONIANS
- James, Henry - THE PORTRAIT OF A LADY
- James, Henry - THE TURN OF THE SCREW
- James, Henry - WASHINGTON SQUARE
- Jerome, Jerome K. - THREE MEN IN A BOAT
- Jerome, Jerome K. - THREE MEN ON THE BUMMEL
- Jonson, Ben - THE ALCHEMIST
- Jonson, Ben - VOLPONE
- Joyce, James - A PORTRAIT OF THE ARTIST AS A YOUNG MAN
- Joyce, James - DUBLINERS
- Joyce, James - ULYSSES
- Kingsley, Charles - THE WATER-BABIES
- Kipling, Rudyard - CAPTAINS COURAGEOUS
- Kipling, Rudyard - INDIAN TALES
- Kipling, Rudyard - JUST SO STORIES
- Kipling, Rudyard - KIM
- Kipling, Rudyard - THE JUNGLE BOOK
- Kipling, Rudyard - THE MAN WHO WOULD BE KING
- Kipling, Rudyard - THE SECOND JUNGLE BOOK
- Lawrence, D. H - THE RAINBOW
- Lawrence, D. H - THE WHITE PEACOCK
- Lawrence, D. H - TWILIGHT IN ITALY
- Lawrence, D. H. - SONS AND LOVERS
- Lawrence, D. H. - WOMEN IN LOVE
- Lear, Edward - BOOK OF NONSENSE
- Lear, Edward - LAUGHABLE LYRICS
- Lear, Edward - MORE NONSENSE
- Lear, Edward - NONSENSE SONG
- London, Jack - MARTIN EDEN
- London, Jack - THE CALL OF THE WILD
- London, Jack - WHITE FANG
- Malthus, Thomas - PRINCIPLE OF POPULATION
- Marryat, Captain - THE CHILDREN OF THE NEW FOREST
- Marx, Karl - THE COMMUNIST MANIFESTO
- Mary, Charles and - TALES FROM SHAKESPEARE
- Melville, Hermann - MOBY DICK
- Melville, Hermann - TYPEE
- Mrs. Beeton - THE BOOK OF HOUSEHOLD MANAGEMENT
- Nesbit, E. - FIVE CHILDREN AND IT
- Nesbit, E. - THE PHOENIX AND THE CARPET
- Nesbit, E. - THE RAILWAY CHILDREN
- Nesbit, E. - THE STORY OF THE AMULET
- Pascal, Blaise - PENSEES
- Pellico, Silvio - LE MIE PRIGIONI
- Poe, Edgar A. - THE FALL OF THE HOUSE OF USHER
- Richardson, Samuel - PAMELA
- Rider Haggard, H. - ALLAN QUATERMAIN
- Rider Haggard, H. - KING SOLOMON'S MINES
- Schopenhauer, Arthur - THE ART OF CONTROVERSY
- Scott, Walter - IVANHOE
- Scott, Walter - QUENTIN DURWARD
- Scott, Walter - ROB ROY
- Scott, Walter - THE BRIDE OF LAMMERMOOR
- Scott, Walter - WAVERLEY
- Sewell, Anna - BLACK BEAUTY
- Shelley, Mary - FRANKENSTEIN
- Sheridan, Richard B. - THE SCHOOL FOR SCANDAL
- Sienkiewicz, Henryk - QUO VADIS
- Sterne, Laurence - A SENTIMENTAL JOURNEY
- Sterne, Laurence - TRISTRAM SHANDY
- Stevenson, Robert Louis - KIDNAPPED
- Stevenson, Robert Louis - THE BLACK ARROW
- Stevenson, Robert Louis - THE MASTER OF BALLANTRAE
- Stevenson, Robert Louis - THE STRANGE CASE OF DR. JEKYLL AND MR. HYDE
- Stevenson, Robert Louis - TREASURE ISLAND
- Stoker, Bram - DRACULA
- Strindberg, August - LUCKY PEHR
- Strindberg, August - MASTER OLOF
- Strindberg, August - THE RED ROOM
- Strindberg, August - THE ROAD TO DAMASCUS
- Strindberg, August - THERE ARE CRIMES AND CRIMES
- Swift, Jonathan - A MODEST PROPOSAL
- Swift, Jonathan - A TALE OF A TUB
- Swift, Jonathan - GULLIVER'S TRAVELS
- Thackeray, William - BARRY LYNDON
- Thackeray, William - VANITY FAIR
- Tolstoi, Lev - WAR AND PEACE
- Tolstoy, Leo - ANNA KARENINA
- Tolstoy, Leo - WAR AND PEACE
- Trollope, Anthony - BARCHESTER TOWERS
- Trollope, Anthony - THE WARDEN
- Twain, Mark - THE ADVENTURES OF HUCKLEBERRY FINN
- Twain, Mark - THE ADVENTURES OF TOM SAWYER
- Twain, Mark - THE PRINCE AND THE PAUPER
- Verne, Jules - 20000 LEAGUES UNDER THE SEAS
- Verne, Jules - A JOURNEY TO THE CENTRE OF THE EARTH
- Verne, Jules - ALL AROUND THE MOON
- Verne, Jules - AROUND THE WORLD IN 80 DAYS
- Verne, Jules - FIVE WEEKS IN A BALLOON
- Verne, Jules - MICHAEL STROGOFF
- Verne, Jules - THE MYSTERIOUS ISLAND
- Wallace, Edgar - SANDERS OF THE RIVER
- Wallace, Edgar - THE DAFFODIL MYSTERY
- Wallace, Lew - BEN HUR
- Wells, H. G. - KIPPS
- Wells, H. G. - THE INVISIBLE MAN
- Wells, H. G. - THE WAR OF THE WORLDS
- Wilde, Oscar - A WOMAN OF NO IMPORTANCE
- Wilde, Oscar - AN IDEAL HUSBAND
- Wilde, Oscar - DE PROFUNDIS
- Wilde, Oscar - LADY WINDERMERE'S FAN
- Wilde, Oscar - THE CANTERVILLE GHOST
- Wilde, Oscar - THE HAPPY PRINCE AND OTHER TALES
- Wilde, Oscar - THE IMPORTANCE OF BEING EARNEST
- Wilde, Oscar - THE PICTURE OF DORIAN GREY
- Woolf, Virgina - THE VOYAGE OUT
- Woolf, Virgina - NIGHT AND DAY
- Woolf, Virginia - LA STANZA DI JACOB
- Woolf, Virginia - MONDAY OR TUESDAY
- Yeats, William Butler - THE COUNTESS CATHLEEN
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<<< - >>> Chaps outside, bank clerks and university fellows, think the life's all
_that_ sort of thing. Don't you believe 'em. Don't you believe 'em."
And then----!
"Boom.... Boom.... Boom.... Boom.... right in the middle of a most
entertaining digression on flats who join touring companies under the
impression that they are actors, Kipps much amused at their flatness as
exposed by Chitterlow.
"Lor'!" said Kipps like one who awakens, "that's not eleven!"
"Must be," said Chitterlow. "It was nearly ten when I got that whiskey.
It's early yet----"
"All the same I must be going," said Kipps, and stood up. "Even
now--maybe. Fact is--I 'ad _no_ idea. The 'ouse door shuts at 'arf past
ten, you know. I ought to 'ave thought before."
"Well, if you _must_ go! I tell you what. I'll come, too.... Why!
There's your leg, old man! Clean forgot it! You can't go through the
streets like that. I'll sew up the tear. And meanwhile have another
whiskey."
"I ought to be getting on _now_," protested Kipps feebly, and then
Chitterlow was showing him how to kneel on a chair in order that the
rent trouser leg should be attainable and old Methusaleh on his third
round was busy repairing the temporary eclipse of Kipps' arterial glow.
Then suddenly Chitterlow was seized with laughter and had to leave off
sewing to tell Kipps that the scene wouldn't make a bad bit of business
in a farcical comedy, and then he began to sketch out the farcical
comedy and that led him to a digression about another farcical comedy of
which he had written a ripping opening scene which wouldn't take ten
minutes to read. It had something in it that had never been done on the
stage before, and was yet perfectly legitimate, namely, a man with a
live beetle down the back of his neck trying to seem at his ease in a
roomful of people....
"_They_ won't lock you out," he said, in a singularly reassuring tone,
and began to read and act what he explained to be (not because he had
written it, but simply because he knew it was so on account of his
exceptional experience of the stage) and what Kipps also quite clearly
saw to be, one of the best opening scenes that had ever been written.
When it was over Kipps, who rarely swore, was inspired to say the scene
was "damned fine" about six times over, whereupon as if by way of
recognition, Chitterlow took a simply enormous portion of the inspiring
antediluvian, declaring at the same time that he had rarely met a
"finer" intelligence than Kipps' (stronger there might be, _that_ he
couldn't say with certainty as yet, seeing how little after all they had
<<< - >>>
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