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as to Pamela, I'll assure you. I clasped my hands together through my
apron, overjoyed at this, though I was soon to go away: For, naughty as
he has been to me, I wish his prosperity with all my heart, for my good
old lady's sake. Well, Pamela, said he, you need not now be afraid to
speak to me; tell me what you lifted up your hands at? I said not a
word. Says he, If you like what I have said, give me your hand upon it.
I held my hand up through my apron; for I could not speak to him; and he
took hold of it, and pressed it, though less hard than he did my arm the
day before. What does the little fool cover her face for? said he: Pull
your apron away; and let me see how you look, after your freedom of
speech of me last night. No wonder you are ashamed to see me. You know
you were very free with my character.
I could not stand this barbarous insult, as I took it to be, considering
his behaviour to me; and I then spoke and said, O the difference between
the minds of thy creatures, good God! How shall some be cast down in
their innocence, while others can triumph in their guilt!
And so saying, I went up stairs to my chamber, and wrote all this; for
though he vexed me at his taunting, yet I was pleased to hear he was
likely to be married, and that his wicked intentions were so happily
overcome as to me; and this made me a little easier. And I hope I have
passed the worst; or else it is very hard. And yet I shan't think myself
at ease quite, till I am with you: For, methinks, after all, his
repentance and amendment are mighty suddenly resolved upon. But the
divine grace is not confined to space; and remorse may, and I hope has,
smitten him to the heart at once, for his injuries to poor me! Yet I
won't be too secure neither.
Having opportunity, I send now what I know will grieve you to the heart.
But I hope I shall bring my next scribble myself; and so conclude, though
half broken-hearted, Your ever dutiful DAUGHTER.
LETTER XXVII
DEAR FATHER AND MOTHER,
I am glad I desired you not to meet me, and John says you won't; for he
told you he is sure I shall get a passage well enough, either behind some
one of my fellow-servants on horseback, or by farmer Nichols's means: but
as to the chariot he talked to you of, I can't expect that favour, to be
sure; and I should not care for it, because it would look so much above
me. But farmer Brady, they say, has a chaise with one horse, and we hope
to borrow that, or hire it, rather than fail; though money runs a little
lowish, after what I have laid out; but I don't care to say so here;
though I warrant I might have what I would of Mrs. Jervis, or Mr.
Jonathan, or Mr. Longman; but then how shall I pay it? you'll say: And,
besides, I don't love to be beholden.
But the chief reason I'm glad you don't set out to meet me, is the
uncertainty; for it seems I must stay another week still, and hope
certainly to go Thursday after. For poor Mrs. Jervis will go at the same
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