Previous - Next

who moralises is invariably plain. There is nothing in the whole
world so unbecoming to a woman as a Nonconformist conscience. And
most women know it, I'm glad to say.

LORD AUGUSTUS. Just my sentiments, dear boy, just my sentiments.

CECIL GRAHAM. Sorry to hear it, Tuppy; whenever people agree with
me, I always feel I must be wrong.

LORD AUGUSTUS. My dear boy, when I was your age -

CECIL GRAHAM. But you never were, Tuppy, and you never will be.
[Goes up C.] I say, Darlington, let us have some cards. You'll
play, Arthur, won't you?

LORD WINDERMERE. No, thanks, Cecil.

DUMBY. [With a sigh.] Good heavens! how marriage ruins a man!
It's as demoralising as cigarettes, and far more expensive.

CECIL GRAHAM. You'll play, of course, Tuppy?

LORD AUGUSTUS. [Pouring himself out a brandy and soda at table.]
Can't, dear boy. Promised Mrs. Erlynne never to play or drink
again.

CECIL GRAHAM. Now, my dear Tuppy, don't be led astray into the
paths of virtue. Reformed, you would be perfectly tedious. That
is the worst of women. They always want one to be good. And if we
are good, when they meet us, they don't love us at all. They like
to find us quite irretrievably bad, and to leave us quite
unattractively good.

LORD DARLINGTON. [Rising from R. table, where he has been writing
letters.] They always do find us bad!

DUMBY. I don't think we are bad. I think we are all good, except
Tuppy.

LORD DARLINGTON. No, we are all in the gutter, but some of us are
looking at the stars. [Sits down at C. table.]

DUMBY. We are all in the gutter, but some of us are looking at the
stars? Upon my word, you are very romantic to-night, Darlington.

CECIL GRAHAM. Too romantic! You must be in love. Who is the
girl?

LORD DARLINGTON. The woman I love is not free, or thinks she
isn't. [Glances instinctively at LORD WINDERMERE while he speaks.]

CECIL GRAHAM. A married woman, then! Well, there's nothing in the
world like the devotion of a married woman. It's a thing no
married man knows anything about.

LORD DARLINGTON. Oh! she doesn't love me. She is a good woman.
She is the only good woman I have ever met in my life.

Previous - Next