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old grandmother. When they were sat down, the farmer placed me at
some distance from him on the table, which was thirty feet high
from the floor. I was in a terrible fright, and kept as far as I
could from the edge, for fear of falling. The wife minced a bit of
meat, then crumbled some bread on a trencher, and placed it before
me. I made her a low bow, took out my knife and fork, and fell to
eat, which gave them exceeding delight. The mistress sent her maid
for a small dram cup, which held about two gallons, and filled it
with drink; I took up the vessel with much difficulty in both
hands, and in a most respectful manner drank to her ladyship's
health, expressing the words as loud as I could in English, which
made the company laugh so heartily, that I was almost deafened with
the noise. This liquor tasted like a small cider, and was not
unpleasant. Then the master made me a sign to come to his trencher
side; but as I walked on the table, being in great surprise all the
time, as the indulgent reader will easily conceive and excuse, I
happened to stumble against a crust, and fell flat on my face, but
received no hurt. I got up immediately, and observing the good
people to be in much concern, I took my hat (which I held under my
arm out of good manners,) and waving it over my head, made three
huzzas, to show I had got no mischief by my fall. But advancing
forward towards my master (as I shall henceforth call him,) his
youngest son, who sat next to him, an arch boy of about ten years
old, took me up by the legs, and held me so high in the air, that I
trembled every limb: but his father snatched me from him, and at
the same time gave him such a box on the left ear, as would have
felled an European troop of horse to the earth, ordering him to be
taken from the table. But being afraid the boy might owe me a
spite, and well remembering how mischievous all children among us
naturally are to sparrows, rabbits, young kittens, and puppy dogs,
I fell on my knees, and pointing to the boy, made my master to
understand, as well as I could, that I desired his son might be
pardoned. The father complied, and the lad took his seat again,
whereupon I went to him, and kissed his hand, which my master took,
and made him stroke me gently with it.

In the midst of dinner, my mistress's favourite cat leaped into her
lap. I heard a noise behind me like that of a dozen stocking-
weavers at work; and turning my head, I found it proceeded from the
purring of that animal, who seemed to be three times larger than an
ox, as I computed by the view of her head, and one of her paws,
while her mistress was feeding and stroking her. The fierceness of
this creature's countenance altogether discomposed me; though I
stood at the farther end of the table, above fifty feet off; and
although my mistress held her fast, for fear she might give a
spring, and seize me in her talons. But it happened there was no
danger, for the cat took not the least notice of me when my master

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