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bar of the House.
But I forget that I am expatiating on a subject wherein I have no
concern, having neither a talent nor an inclination for satire. On
the other side, I am so entirely satisfied with the whole present
procedure of human things, that I have been for some years preparing
material towards "A Panegyric upon the World;" to which I intended
to add a second part, entitled "A Modest Defence of the Proceedings
of the Rabble in all Ages." Both these I had thoughts to publish by
way of appendix to the following treatise; but finding my common-
place book fill much slower than I had reason to expect, I have
chosen to defer them to another occasion. Besides, I have been
unhappily prevented in that design by a certain domestic misfortune,
in the particulars whereof, though it would be very seasonable, and
much in the modern way, to inform the gentle reader, and would also
be of great assistance towards extending this preface into the size
now in vogue--which by rule ought to be large in proportion as the
subsequent volume is small--yet I shall now dismiss our impatient
reader from any further attendance at the porch; and having duly
prepared his mind by a preliminary discourse, shall gladly introduce
him to the sublime mysteries that ensue.
SECTION I.--THE INTRODUCTION.
Whoever has an ambition to be heard in a crowd must press, and
squeeze, and thrust, and climb with indefatigable pains, till he has
exalted himself to a certain degree of altitude above them. Now, in
all assemblies, though you wedge them ever so close, we may observe
this peculiar property, that over their heads there is room enough;
but how to reach it is the difficult point, it being as hard to get
quit of number as of hell.
"--Evadere ad auras,
Hoc opus, hic labor est." {59}
To this end the philosopher's way in all ages has been by erecting
certain edifices in the air; but whatever practice and reputation
these kind of structures have formerly possessed, or may still
continue in, not excepting even that of Socrates when he was
suspended in a basket to help contemplation, I think, with due
submission, they seem to labour under two inconveniences. First,
that the foundations being laid too high, they have been often out
of sight and ever out of hearing. Secondly, that the materials
being very transitory, have suffered much from inclemencies of air,
especially in these north-west regions.
Therefore, towards the just performance of this great work there
remain but three methods that I can think on; whereof the wisdom of
our ancestors being highly sensible, has, to encourage all aspiring
adventures, thought fit to erect three wooden machines for the use
of those orators who desire to talk much without interruption.
These are the Pulpit, the Ladder, and the Stage-itinerant.
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